What Does Tantra Mean?

If you asked 5 tantra practitioners from different locations in the world what it means to practice tantra, you’d likely get 5 completely different answers. Even the meaning of the word “tantra” itself is often debated: the most widely used definition is “to loom or weave”; but in his book “Tantra Illuminated”, tantra scholar and expert Christopher D. Wallis disputes this definition, claiming that the “weave” definition was for a completely unrelated word with the same spelling.

I personally prefer Wallis’ definition, so we’ll start with that (although I wouldn’t go around correcting people who use the “weave” definition, as metaphorically – if not etymologically – it is acceptable): according to Wallis, the Sanskrit word Tantra in this context etymologically is “an instrument (tra) for expansion (tan)”. He expands upon this with a proper definition: “a ‘system of practices’, more precisely psychophysical and awareness cultivation practices, whose end-point is embodied liberation (jīvanmukti).” I’ll unpack that a little bit: “psychophysical” meaning internal and external worlds, and “embodied liberation” in this context meaning finding spiritual enlightenment (moksha) within the body and the senses. So my frankensteined definition would be: “connecting to the divine through our bodies, using practices that bring awareness to both our inner and outer experiences.” It’s a union of within and without, earth and god. (“Weave” actually seems a pretty fitting word, if by coincidence.)

How Is Tantra Practiced?

So now we’ve defined tantra – how do we learn to practice it? Some would say that we’d have to go back a couple thousand years and ask the original Tantrikas, or move to India and find a guru, as it’s been said that this is the only true way to learn the path of tantra. I personally don’t subscribe to this school of thought, as I’ve had profound mystical and emotional experiences and huge paradigm shifts using tantric practices here in the west, under the guidance of teachers that didn’t study with gurus of classical tantra philosophy.

I remember attending my first tantric puja on an outdoor deck at a dance festival, where all the attendees (myself included) were dressed in sexy and/or animal-print outfits – not exactly the ritual and reverent setting one would expect from a traditional puja in a temple. While going through the practices with each partner – which included synced breathing, sustained eye contact, energetic “dearmoring”, and even primal screaming – I felt fears melting away from me, I felt my heart opening effortlessly, I became one with the humans and birds and trees around me, and I felt my nervous system completely at rest. That one moment completely changed my life and my path, and led me to this insatiable desire I have to share the delicious experience with all of humanity.

Every well-held tantra event and training I’ve attended since then has led me to some version of that same first experience, even though the facilitators, techniques and exercises have all varied. This shows me that the tantric wisdom lies dormant within each of us, and only needs a witness and some gentle guidance to fully awaken it.

How Do I Practice Tantra With A Parter?

While tantra is a way of living, worshipping, and appreciating every individual experience, it can be also practiced with a partner to amplify the deliciousness in each moment. This is the main reason why people come to tantra in the first place – often they hear about it as “tantric sex” and get curious about it.

So without further ado, I’ll very briefly cover the most common types of partner tantra practice, at least as we know them in the west (because that’s probably what you came for!):

• White tantra (AKA right-handed tantra, and sometimes classical tantra): a set of practices done with a partner(s), that usually involve some combination of breath, eye-gazing, touch, and sound. “Pure”, no sexual energy is exchanged, only upper chakras are engaged.
• Pink tantra: a blend of white and red tantra. The heart chakra is welcomed as a bridge between the divine and the body, and more sensuality is introduced.
• Red tantra (AKA left-handed tantra, tantric sex, neo-tantra, or sacred sex): sexual energy is exchanged, all chakra engagement is welcomed, everything is embraced as sacred. White/pink tantra practices are used during sexual intercourse.

For reference, most tantric pujas in the west will fall somewhere between white and pink tantra. Once one learns these practices from a teacher or from attending a puja, they can bring them into their intimate relationships, and feel a new level of depth and connection. If you’re interested in learning some of these practices with your partner, you can schedule a session with me, or come to a puja.

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So, what is tantra then? I’d simply say that if a practice is an instrument for expansion – if it is an awareness cultivation practice that brings you to a sense of embodied liberation, it’s a tantric practice, whether it’s learned from a guru, read in a sacred text, or downloaded via intuition. Some of the modern tantric practices are modifications of their original form, but they still lead us to that space of embodied liberation. I would liken this to our westernized version of the bhakti tradition of kirtan (call-and-response chanting of the names of the divine) that I’m so fond of: we’ll often use guitars, djembes, and chord progressions instead of single notes on our harmoniums to appease western ears, but our intention is still the same: sending a ritual offering of love to the divine. In this sense, tantra is also a form of bhakti (devotional yoga)!